NAMBLA Announces Social Media Strategy for 2009

The North American Man/Boy Love Association’s Head of Marketing, Peter File, announced today their spectacular launch into online social media.

The much maligned group who want to foster the natural love and joy between an old fat man and an unwilling young boy, have decided to use the internet to promote their organisation more widely.

“We put our business out to pitch and were surprised that most of the big digital agencies jumped at the chance to work for us. They weren’t concerned about what we stood for. They just saw the size of our budget and the sweatiness of our hands. We put out a request for proposal and after a tough selection process, we narrowed it down to Carat and WPP. We chose WPP as one of their directors is on the board of NAMBLA as well.”

Mario joins as Head of Human/boy Relations

Mario joins as Head of Human/boy Relations

Their strategy will be multifaceted. Firstly they are going to create a Twitter account (@comeseemypuppy) where NAMBLA gets to follow you. Which is just how they like it. The account cannot be ‘followed’ as being followed is NAMBLA’s biggest fear, along with the sex-offenders register and ugly kids.

The next phase will be a viral-marketing campaign featuring a spoof of Cadbury’s famous ‘gorilla playing with the drums’ video. However, in a stroke of genius (and boy leg), instead of a gorilla it will be a big fat hairy man and instead of the drums it will be Ron Weasley.

Finally there will be a sponsored Bebo soap-opera, perfect given the target demographic, featuring Vanessa Mae the child violin prodigy. The incredibly clever and expensive strap line will be:

“Not all Kiddy-Fiddlers are evil.  NAMBLA – we just wanted a look”

TechChuff applauds such innovation and in the words of Glenn Quagmire, when he found the tied-up cheerleader in the locker-room toilets:

‘Dear Diary. Jackpot.

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